Day 63: Milk a cow





Completed number 43 on my list of things to do: I milked a cow.  And as an added bonus I fed a donkey wheat bread that thanked me by producing a very loud fart.  The proprietor of this cattle farm, Marlon, didn’t waste much time with instructions  or warnings. He simply demonstrated the technique by squirting my kids and me with the cow’s milk. This left Zach crying that the cow had peed on him. After some hesitation and fear, I took over. And as was promised milk was delivered. “Mama” was most patient with my  loud squealing and general  misuse of her mammaries.  For her patience, “Mama” was returned to her calf and rewarded with bread. For my hard work and diligence, I was rewarded with a half a cup of milk and shit covered flip flops.  

"Mama"

Day 62: Day on the Beach

A day of over indulgence and relaxation was spent on the beach.  With a cooler full of Heineken, sun tan oil (that went largely unused), and a bag of chips, we settled into the beach before 11AM and spent the next six hours watching the waves. The Gulf felt unusually fantastic; there weren’t any pesky jelly fish or sea weed.  At the end of the day, he cooked hamburgers and we  were joined on the front porch by my parents. Other than going by entirely too quickly, it was a perfect day.

Day 61: Sushi for lunch

Ansley and I have recently discovered area sushi restaurants. It is fast becoming our new favorite hobby. Today we shared a plate of California roll, tuna (raw roll, and shrimp tempura.  We both love sushi and are determined to attempt to make it at home ourselves. That is number 67 on my list.

Day 60: Write a short story to share

Today I wrote a short story to share.  Writing is a process where revision is essential.  I was able to complete a draft and even revise it somewhat, but the story needs time more than anything. It needs to be left alone to percolate so when I return I can see more clearly what it needs or doesn’t need.  It is a story of a young uneducated widow who receives some much needed money.  What will she do with the money having never made decisions for herself or been around people who have made good decisions? She is left with a 400 car payment yet lives in an apartment. She has a 1000 department store credit card because she decorated her baby’s room in everything Tinkerbelle.  She has a part time job at a dollar store and dreams of a weekend at the beach with her chain smoking husband who drinks too much. So how does she react to sudden “wealth?”  Below is from the first draft:

The first social security check arrived a week before Thanksgiving.  Her hands trembled as she studied the check for $1014.00. It was the most money she had ever possessed or even seen.  Her short marriage to Dwayne had given her a daughter, a photo album,   and now a monthly paycheck.  Her thoughts momentarily went to Dwayne’s wake when his drunk mother refused to get out of the car or turn down the radio that blared   Three Dog Night. When Stephanie looked at the lifeless body of her husband, she felt more afraid than anything. The fall from the scaffolding had severed his head, but through the miracles of modern funeral services and a cleverly placed turtle neck, his head was perfectly in place. She was terrified that he would leap out of the coffin and grab her. Besides her great aunt who had a heart attack while picking scuppernongs, she had never seen a dead body. When she found her crumbled next to an overturned bucket of scuppernongs she wasn’t afraid then. She thought the old lady looked silly with her cotton dress blowing over her head revealing a rather large pair of white cotton panties. Unaware that life had left her 87 year old aunt, Stephanie thought the woman was taking a nap in the most peculiar place.

  Dwayne’s coffin had been decorated with his beloved Crimson Tide football; a hugger with an unopened Miller LIte, a pack of Doral’s and a picture of Stephanie the day Destiny had been born.  When they lowered the casket into the earth the next day, for a brief moment Stephanie thought that he would need a lighter. It seemed as if Dwayne spent most of his time looking for lighters even though he smoked a cigarette at least every half hour. He was one of the expert smokers that could  dangle a cigarette from his lips even if he was stooped over changing a tire or giving Destiny a bottle.  However,  he seemed to never have a lighter. So it was natural for her to worry that he would spend all of eternity with a whole pack of Doral’s and no lighter.

  Destiny was only 18 months old when her daddy died.  Stephanie who never knew her own father didn’t think this was as tragic as others insisted it was. The real tragedy Stephanie thought was that she had to pay rent, child care, and a car payment and buy groceries all by herself now.  Her part time job at Family Dollar would barely cover her $400 car payment. She figured she  could let Dwayne’s truck get repossessed. ..

Day 59: Spontaneous Date With my Husband

After attending a wake of a former employee of JP’s father, we went out to dinner. We were already dressed up for the wake, so  we thought it only made sense to take advantage of the night out and make a date out of it.  We enjoyed a nice dinner and pleasant conversation.  Although the original purpose of our evening was less than romantic, the night evolved into a rather nice date between two people very much in love.

Day 58: Write a book for Zach

I finally completed Zach's book and sent itoff to be "published."  For a small fee, the company will print the pages and bind them with a hard back cover. The book will help Zach learn the alphabet using people and things he is already familiar with. Each letter is accompanied by a photo or clip art and the entire book rhymes. Here is the text of the book with just a few of the photos.


A is for Ansley who is always so kind
 B is for the bugs that I love to find
C  is for cookies, candy, and cakes.
I like them better than the vegetables mom makes.  D is for Daddy who carries me so high, and hugs and kisses me when I fall down and cry.
E is for the eyes and ears that I use every day.
 F is for football that I will one day play.
G is for green, grass, and giggles galore. G is for gooey and goblins and more!
H is for my favorite animal the horse. When I’m a cowboy, I will ride one of course.
I  is for icky itchy and the ice cream I love to eat. I will eat anything as long as it’s sweet.
 is for my super cool brother: JP!

J
 K is for kisses my mama gives me
L is for love that helps me grow. Love is the most important, even this I know. M is for morgan, mama, and me
N is for Nemo a movie about a fish in the sea
O is for ostrich and the number One
P is for Pee Paw who is so much fun.
Q is for quarter, quilt, and queens.
R is for my room that is never clean.
 S is for San San who likes to play games
T is for my trucks, tractors, and trains  V is for vacuum, something else I like to do.

U is for up, up, up and under too.

W  is for War Eagle! I can scream this to you. At my house, we love the orange and the blue!
X is for x rays that the doctor may take.
 Y is for the yawn that when I’m sleepy I make
 Z is for me, a sweet little boy named Zach. And if you aren’t looking, with kisses and hugs Ill attack!

Day 57: Complete Two Miles

I go to the gym at least two times each week. Normally, after working out with the weight machines, I get on the treadmill. I hate the treadmill!  I am always so bored and restless and ready to leave. Therefore, on a really good day I manage to complete one mile. So today, when I pushed myself to complete two miles I felt like I had completed a marathon.  With legs shaking and heart pumping, I left the building anticipating applause, trophies, and cheers.  I’m still waiting.